She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
