Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
