he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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