hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Congratulations! We have a period
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