its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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