She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize