when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
