so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I just sucked dick on a ferry
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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