Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
