Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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