It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
