I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
