I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
