i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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