Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
it's great music for shaving your balls
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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