We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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