There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
