it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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