i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
