It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
