I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
