Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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