dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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