hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I'm at about main and main street
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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