Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
