Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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