I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
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