no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
