And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
wow bdsm is so cute
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
