Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Randomize