what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
This is classic penis vs brain.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
