I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
