I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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