No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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