she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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