Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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