I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize