i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
