you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize