She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Randomize
