as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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