I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
