My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
