I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
