At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
