He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Randomize
