So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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