So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Drunk is not a location!
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
