may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
