i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
