Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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