i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
